Why I Was In The Tub At 3:30 AM…..

Warning: If you happen to be eating, you may want to save this post til later. And those of you who are not moms or medics– flee now while you still can!

Queasy types all gone? Good.

Yesterday evening I put lovely clean new sheets on the bed. As I slipped gratefully into the nicely made bed at bedtime, I thought, “Oh, I sure hope the baby’s diaper doesn’t leak all over the sheets tonight.”


Around 3 am the baby started crying and making alarming sounds in her throat. My first thought– true confession — was of my immaculate sheets. Instinct kicked in. I leaped, catlike, out of the bed over the three year old (who had also migrated in for a cuddling), dragging the baby with me.

I made it to within 3 steps of the easy-clean bathroom vinyl when she erupted in puke all over both of us. So close and yet so far. Sitting down on the floor so as not to trail it all the way to the bathroom, I hollered for my hubby to turn on the light and get me a towel.

Then I faced the dreaded dilemma– who do I strip first? Pure revulsion kicked in and I started peeling my own clothes off, thinking gratefully of Daring Young Mom’s: Save Yourselves! post.

Hubby brought me a washcloth to wipe us both down as much as possible, then accepted the towel and both our PJ’s to bring to the laundry room where he did … something with them…put them in the washer, I hope, though I didn’t actually check on that, come to think of it.

Shivering and clad only in my undies, I wiped the carpet with the baby crying pitifully next to me. Yup. Big fun.

Unfortunately she and I both still reeked, even after the wipedown, so the only thing to do was a bath, which surprisingly felt very very nice despite the unholy hour. Until the baby tooted in the water, making me fear for our cleanliness again. Thankfully it turned out to be just toots.

Hubby laid PJ’s out in the bathroom for the baby and went back to bed. Baby and I soaked for a good half-hour. She felt so bad that she was all cuddly, just resting on my chest and looking at me. Finally I decided we MUST get out. Got dressed and sat by the fire rocking for half an hour or so to let our hair dry.

She kept retching off and on, and I was STILL afraid for the sheets, so I opted to sleep the rest of the night out on the couch with her. (The new couches STILL haven’t come and I decided I’d much rather have her puke on my heading-out-the-door couch than my bed. )

As it turned out we made it through the rest of the night without incident. Today she is still droopy and cuddly but has had some ice and part of a bottle without vomiting again, so I am hoping she is on the mend. This has been the slowest-moving flu ever– I’ve had one kid a week puking for the past 3 weeks. At that rate, only 5 more weeks to go. Sigh.

On another note, I decided while sitting in puke this morning that I totally DESERVE one of Daring Young Mom’s very cool pink T-shirts. Do you think age 38 is too old to wear a “Daring Young Mom” shirt?


  1. 38 is NOT too old to wear that shirt! Wear it, and wear it proud 🙂

  2. i think you should wear it, too. 🙂 sorry you had a looong night with the sick one. hopefully the bug will leave your house after this!! for good!

  3. Oh Mary. I'm so sorry. I love the line, "so close but so far" Isn't that just the way?

    Hoping you can get some rest somehow.

  4. Definitely not to old.

    This reminded me of the time I saw a yak coming and jerked the kid off of the bed–only to have him yak on the floor. "Which is easier to clean, Jeana? Sheets over a plastic mattress cover, or carpet?" Unlike you, I was nowhere near linolium. Or my right mind.

  5. After jumping out of bed like that I definitely do not think that the you are too old for that T…wear it with pride!

  6. Oof. Been there. That vomit smell does indeed take a good bath to get rid of. And that leaping-out-of-bed-with-an-imminently-barfing-child thing should be in the Mommy Olympics. I hope your little one is feeling better and better!!

  7. Bless your heart!! I do remember those days well, but I would probably have to clean up what I contributed to the mess, too. Give me poop, blood, infected sores, broken bones–and I'm your girl. If I get a whiff of upchuck, look out, folks! Honestly, though, when mine was small, it didn't make me sick to clean up after her.

    Here's hoping the flu bug has finally run its course and everyone is back to health soon. 🙂

  8. please! 38 is so young. pink would be a great color on you 😉
    i just hope YOU don't get those cooties.
    two of mine had that in Jan. we saved the crib matress for nights like this. we stick it in our bathroom and since the floor in there is tile and easier to clean then carpet. barf on carpet is a nightmare!

  9. I completely get the whole sheet thing! Especially since they were so fresh and crisp! So sorry, you and the baby didn't get to enjoy them much!

    I'm always amazed at my body's abilities to move when it really has to!

  10. I love the shirt you totally need it!

  11. Oh man that is the WORST. One night a few weeks ago Anna woke me up in the middle of the night crying; she had puked everywhere…she ended up in the tub TWICE that night. I am so queasy when it comes to vomit, I hope I don't have to see it again any time soon!

  12. 38 can't be too old when this 44 year old mama has one, the green one!
    I'm sorry the baby is so pukey.
    Like you I would have spared the sheets too and there is nothing wrong with that.
    Hope the baby is better.

  13. Yes, we've just been through all that…

    Hope you get through it QUICKLY!!

  14. Sorry about the rough night, you earned the t-shirt.

  15. Been wondering the same thing myself at 39. I think I may need to get one myself sometime soon. You go for it, Mary!

    Hope your rounds with vomit end soon. I have so been there. I usually manage to get "just about" to the wipeable area, too.

  16. Shhhh….Don't tell. I'm getting the shirts for a couple of moms much longer in the tooth than you for a certain mother-loving holiday coming up.

    I loved the idea of a bath at 3am. I'm sorry about how it came about. I hope you're all feeling better soon.

  17. I read this post KNOWING I had the guts and gross-out experiences to handle it. Oh, yes, the many forms of puke and poops.

    Good job on saving the sheets! I hate to admit that I wouldn't let our boys sleep in our nicely covered bed when tummy ill, either. 😉

  18. my life and your life could be from the same book. I have survived two puking people in my house this week (one of them was ME!)

    For future reference, Resolve Carpet Cleaner gets out technicolor puke. My friend, Linda, swears by it…..

    Best wishes for clean sheets and healthy kids…(or should I have said healthy kids and clean sheets?)

    Suzanne http://suzannebalvanz.blogspot.com/

  19. I saw my life flash before my eyes!! My bed has suffered this week, which is not like me but with my 4th baby – I've gotten a little lazy. He threw up before I could sit up and hang him over the edge of the bed to puke on the wood floor along the way to the bathroom. Then earlier this morning – he pooped (baby poop – yellow and travels well!!) all over my freshly stripped brand new IKEA mattress…

    For the love of being a mom…

  20. Get the shirt. 🙂 Oh, and I always fixed myself first when my kiddo got sick… I couldn't handle my stinking… 😉

  21. Isn't it amazing how you can be utterly unconscious, hear that sound, and erupt into full action? I'm constantly amazed by it.

    Feeling your pain in a very literal way here as the stomach bug is making its way through my 5 children this week. Yay.

  22. Resolve– gotta get some! Thanks for the tip!


  23. Oh man! I will quit feeling sorry for myself now! I hate the flu and that is always how it goes for us, but not as many! Hang in there! Oh I have a new blog because my gigglin and screamin will NOT work! So come see me and tell me what you think! Oh and I have your link on my new one too!:)

  24. I feel your pain! I don't handle my kid's illnesses well! I've had midnight baths too – only out of necessity!

  25. UGH! So very sorry! Middle of the night sickness…ICK!

  26. Definately not too old. I just got mine in the mail on Monday, and I LOVE IT. It makes me feel … daring. In a completely covered up sort of way.